Nemoc

S nemocemi to už dávno nefunguje tak, jako když jsem byla malá holka. Žádné výhody z vysokého čísla na teploměru neplynou. Žádná televize celý den(což jsem dřív brala buhvíproč jako výhru) a babička vařící dobroty. Jen utíkající práce, věci, které stejně budu muset dohánět, jen co se uzdravím. Být nemocná přestala být zábava někdy mezi základkou a gymplem a začal být pořádný opruz někdy mezi gymplem a vysokou. Ach jo.

Dreams

You learn to ignore the things that bug you, because otherwise, you are content, maybe even happy. But your fears and your anger stay in some place hidden inside of you. Suddenly, out of nowhere, they bite. In your dreams, when you cannot protect yourself or handle them well. You wake up scared and angry and the emotions are so intense that you feel like you need to act on them right now, this second and not one later. It was not a regular nightmare that made you feel this way. It was believable and tapped right into your hidden place, into the fears that you did not want to acknowledge. Calls for completely irrational reactions precisely because it was so intense. Then, when the initial shock surpasses, you start wondering if you should not deal with the emotions rather than burry them inside. But you slowly start putting the pieces back to the place that will allow you to ignore them. Until the next time...