So many things are on my mind right now. How certain someone number 1 has not been an act of revenge or torture but how I genuinely loved him. How I am quite confused about my feelings right now. How I changed over past few months. And if that change was bound to happen or if it was caused by meeting certain someone number 2. How can you ever figure things out? Paradoxes in life are huge - you do not want to be in a relationship and you meet someone who does and when you want to be in a relationship you meet someone who does not. Damn.